A South Carolina-Georgia football game = a wonderful surprise for the Faile family.

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Close up shop. We're done here.

Via: ab4g.co

It's in a jar, because that's where ghosts are stored… Obviously.

This is what Bobby Jones looked like when he was one of the most dominant golfers the world's ever seen.

And this is what he looks like today.

This according to an ebay auction that will allow you to buy Bobby Jones' ghost, which is currently housed in this very jar, for only $1000. Here's the harrowing tale of how the current owner came to possess the ghost.

Earlier this year, I began to hear strange voices come from my garage and specifically my golf clubs. The voice would repeat “Syringomyelia, Syringomyelia.” At first I had no idea what the ghost was saying, so I googled the word. Syringomyelia is the disease that paralyzed killed hall of fame golfer Bobby Jones. I asked the apparition are you Bobby Jones? The ghost then became visible dressed in 1950’s golfing gear. The ghost said yes I am Bobby Jones. I didn’t know what to do, so in panic I took the jar next to me and forced the ghost of Bobby Jones into the container. Thankfully this ghostly version of Bobby Jones was the paralyzed version of him and not the pristine athlete from the 1920’s.

As much as I like having Mr.Jones in my house, my wife is petrified of ghosts and is now forcing me to sell him. I have decided to sell Mr. Jones on ebay and donate half of the proceeds to the cure Syringomyelia fund.

Unfortunately Mr. Jones ghost can only be seen by true believers. If you are not a true believer bid with caution, for you may be unable to see him. I will not be giving refunds, so bid with caution as this is something impossible to authenticate and verify.

So if you had visions of hitting the links with Ghost Bobby, think again. Ghost Bobby can't walk. But before you buy him you'll have to look in the mirror and figure out where you stand on the morality of purchasing a person, albehim* dead.

Also though the "Buy Now" price is $1000, I have a feeling if you meet the starting bid of $500, no one's going to outspend you.

*Albeit but for a person, it's going to be a thing.

LINK: Check out the ebay listing here.

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Find out who's on top of the MLB charts.

*Includes multiple songs used by certain players, as some batters change at-bat songs more often than they change socks.

Image by Chris Ritter/Buzzfeed

Genre Breakdown for All Playoff Teams:

Image by John Gara/Buzzfeed

WEIRDEST CHOICE: Josh Reddick of the Oakland A's really loves the WWE. He's used the theme music of wrestlers Triple H, the Big Show, and Stone Cold Steve Austin.

Image by Rebecca Cook / Reuters

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The champion cyclist has steadfastly maintained that he never took performance-enhancing drugs. But a 200-page report by the U.S. Anti-Doping Agency indicates otherwise.

First, USADA issued a press release that states plainly that Armstrong and his teammates were doping.

Image by Lucas Jackson / Reuters

"The evidence shows beyond any doubt that the US Postal Service Pro Cycling Team ran the most sophisticated, professionalized and successful doping program that sport has ever seen," USADA head Travis Tygart wrote in the statement.

Via: usada.org

Image by Christinne Muschi / Reuters

In a statement sent to BuzzFeed on behalf of Armstrong, from his attorney:

We have seen the press release from USADA touting the upcoming release today of its "reasoned decision." Tygart’s statement confirms the alleged “reasoned decision” from USADA will be a one-sided hatchet job - a taxpayer funded tabloid piece rehashing old, disproved, unreliable allegations based largely on axe-grinders, serial perjurers, coerced testimony, sweetheart deals and threat -induced stories. Ignoring the 500-600 tests Lance Armstrong passed, ignoring all exculpatory evidence, and trying to justify the millions of dollars USADA has spent pursuing one, single athlete for years, USADA has continued its government funded witch hunt of only Mr. Armstrong, a retired cyclist, in violation of its own rules and due process, in spite of USADA’s lack of jurisdiction, in blatant violation of the statute of limitations, and without honoring UCI’s demand to produce the entire USADA “file” for an independent review and decision as mandated by national and international rules.

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Not only does this story have an unlikely hero in Raúl Ibáñez, but it legitimately humbles Alex Rodriguez. I didn't know that was possible.

In the bottom of the 9th inning with one out and the Yankees down a run to the Baltimore Orioles, the game was on the line. New York decided to pinch-hit for the highest-paid mediocre baseball player in history: the ice cold A-Rod.

It's not that Ibáñez isn't good, but he's old, and has been relegated to the bench this year. His best days are decidedly behind him.

You can tell that A-Rod was super excited about that decision.

But then...

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And he wants you to know he's being responsible about it.

News of a potential pup in the Vick household broke earlier this week, when sports bloggers noticed a box of Milk-Bone treats in the corner of a photo Vick tweeted of him and his daughter. The photo was quickly deleted.

Arrow via Chris Chase at USA TODAY Sports.

Source: @MikeVick

But on Thursday, Vick confirmed the news in a statement to TMZ:

Image by Harry Lynch/Raleigh News & Observer/MCT / Getty Images

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From 2001. For Nike. Just Do It.

"What am I on?...What are YOU on?"

One of the frat dudes from Total Frat Move sits down for an interview.

Since Roger Dorn is an alias, I couldn't use his picture up top. So here's a recent shot from Total Frat Move's "Fratography" section.

Source: totalfratmove.com

Recently, BuzzFeed Sports has been going back and forth a bit with popular fraternity website Total Frat Move. They took issue with our Frattiest QBs in the NFL post, and made some jokes at my expense. I was unfamiliar with TFM before the incident so I did some research and went through their site and Twitter accounts. That led to the post 25 Reminders That Fraternities Are The Worst.

At that point Roger Dorn (not his real name, but his "nom de douche" over at TFM), proposed that we do an interview exchange for the sites. My interview ran over on Total Frat Move yesterday (You can read it here, and yes, they chose the worst picture of me that's ever existed). What follows is our interview with "Roger Dorn."

(Oh and just in case you don't know. "GDI" means God Damn Independent.)

What is the most intense/craziest hazing you've ever come across working for TFM?

To be honest, I don't hear about too many crazy hazing stories. I mean they're out there, but they're usually kept in-house so to speak. There was a recent story from the University of Tennessee where a kid was rushed to the hospital because he was butt-chugging (anal bonging) Franzia wine, allegedly. He wasn't being hazed, though, which would have been easier to explain.

Your site seems to have a strong Republican lean. Are you all Republicans? What are your thoughts on abortion (an issue that would probably come up with all the sex you all claim to be having)?

The tone is getting serious here, Jackie. By "you all," I assume you're talking about the people I work with at TFM. Yes, we are all Republicans. All eight of us. I can only speak for myself on the matter of abortion; I'm against it.

How do you reconcile the homoeroticism and homophobia that seem to simultaneously exist in your community?

This is clearly a major sticking point with you. I've never encountered this homoerotica that you seem to think runs rampant in the fraternity culture. I mean I suppose there are fraternities out there that openly promote the acceptance of homosexuals, but that was never my thing, and like you told me, "not that there is anything wrong with it" anyway.

I think you got too caught up in the Animal House scene where Kevin Bacon's character is on all fours in his whitey tighties meeting the business end of a paddle, asking the wide-eyed creep in the ritual robe, "Thank you, sir. May I have another?" You need to watch the rest of that movie. The reality is much closer to the debauchery of the Delta house. I don't think anyone's really bringing home Dean Wormer's wife for a roll in the hay, but you get my point. You remind me of Flounder in that movie, except a lot skinnier. But really, homoerotic paddle sessions are simply not a part of the fraternity culture. Elephant walks are a myth, as well. Simple pledge scare tactics.

How much of a problem is date rape in frat culture? Is a woman being too drunk to consent rape? Did your frat ever talk to its members about date rape?

Date rape happens. I recently published a story about a fraternity house at Wesleyan University that students widely refer to as the "Rape Factory." Now, how bad the problem is, I have no idea. I personally don't know a single person ever accused of rape of any sort, nor will I ever associate myself with someone like that. Shit just ain't cool.

I'm a lover, Jack, a generous, consent-demanding lover.

How do you justify the way women are demeaned in the frat world ("Slams," contests to sleep with the most sorority girls, "Hogging," etc.)? Do you have nightmares of having a daughter who encounters frat guys? If not, why?

I won't go as far to say I "justify" it. It's satire. Overly derogatory terms can be funny, and the obvious sensationalism shouldn't leave any doubts about its sincerity. If you take it seriously, you probably still need to hold someone's hand while crossing the street.

I've never heard of "hogging," but it sounds hilarious. With consent, of course. Hell yes I have nightmares at the thought of bringing a daughter into this world. Have you seen the rush boob phenomenon on our website?

Is "slut dropping" a real thing? If so, why?

I have literally never heard of that, and did you really link me a story about slut dropping trending in Europe? Your outlandish fraternity perceptions are losing validity, Jack.

I get that you guys hate cargo shorts, but why do you love those dumb shorts with the little animals on them?

I had to ask my coworkers what you were referring to. I've never seen those before, so needless to say I don't own any. It sounds like a loud, gimmicky variation of the standard khaki shorts. I don't think too many guys are wearing them to be taken seriously.

You guys seem really concerned with telling the world how much better you are, why the overcompensation?

Sometimes a GDI just needs to hear it.

Why do you guys embrace such negative stereotypes?

Because they're funny. And it seems to drive people like you crazy, and that's really funny.

Many defenders of TFM call it a satire, but satire implies that you guys don't approve of the things your site tweets and seems to glorify. How can it both be satirical and embrace the ideas held in this post?

You're assuming a lot there, GDI Jack. First off, who are these "defenders?" Are you framing your assumption that the ideas in that post are embraced based on comments on the website itself, or the stereotypical frat guy ideology you've crafted in your brain to help yourself sleep at night in your cold, vagina-less bed?

I think I'd rather use the money to buy a small house.

This isn't four guys standing bored. It's three guys ignoring A-Rod, and A-Rod pretending not to care.

Image by Ray Stubblebine / Reuters

I was thinking about going to see the Yankees and Orioles finish off their first round playoff series this evening, so I fired up the Internet machine, swam through the web tubes until I found myself at StubHub. Now typically Yankees tickets are insanely cheap on the site. So cheap in fact that the Yankees have been bitching about it often this year. I rarely paid more than $10 to see a game.

Turns out you can get into the playoffs pretty cheaply too. The cheapest ticket was a very reasonable $16. But more interesting was the most expensive ticket.

Source: stubhub.com

Anybody want to pay $234,234.00 to sit in the grandstand where you can't buy alcohol? Anybody?

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Let's just say Sammy Sosa knocks it out of the park. And by “knocks it out of the park,” I mean that a park bench could give a better performance.

The clip is from the 2001 movie "On The Line," starring Lance Bass and Joey Fatone (yes, really):

Via: imdb.com

It stars Sammy Sosa, who, in this scene, hits a dude in the crotch for the third time:

Sammy Sosa, demonstrating his inability to count.

Greg Zenas had never played varsity soccer before, even though he has been team manager for the Dexter, Michigan high school for the last six years. On October 4, his team and coach Scott Forrester surprised him with the opportunity to play.

Zenas didn't know he was going to play until his coach handed him a brown paper bag with his cleats and shin guards.

Source: Courtney Sacco  /  via: annarbor.com

When he was announced over the P.A. system, the crowd went crazy and kept cheering for Zenas, No. 17, throughout the game.

Source: Courtney Sacco  /  via: annarbor.com

He had several touches, including some near the opposing team's goal, and played for over half the game.

Source: Courtney Sacco  /  via: annarbor.com

“He feels like he’s one of them,” said his mom, Julie Zenas. “He has for the last six years, but I think it’s the sense of accomplishment, of being out there.”

Source: Courtney Sacco  /  via: annarbor.com

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An injury in the 12th inning of the Detroit Tigers' win over the Yankees, means the end of the Yankee captain's season.

Image by Mike Segar / Reuters

After more late-game heroics from Raúl Ibáñez kept the Yankees alive against Detroit, both teams traded scoreless half-innings until the 12th. With one man on, Detroit's Delmon Young ripped a double to right field that finally broke the tie. It was an RBI that would prove to be all the Tigers needed to top the Yankees, but it wasn't the story of the night. Because on the very next play Derek Jeter attempted to make a pretty routine play when his age finally betrayed him.

Jhonny Peralta hit a ball up the middle, Jeter went to make a play that he's made approximately 4,000,003 times in his career.

But his ankle just gave out.

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Ever wonder what it's like to jump 24 miles straight down and possibly break the sound barrier? Well, Felix Baumgartner did it so you wouldn't have to.

Here's the sight Felix Baumgartner faced when he stuck his legs out of the capsule and prepared to fall 24 miles to the Earth's surface.

Go.

As Felix fell, this is what his family (and the world) saw: a white dot on a field of black.

After a brief discussion over his visor fogging up, Felix opened his chute as he neared the Earth.

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In today's Tampa Bay - Kansas City fiasco, this play happened, ruining football forever.

The Chiefs are incredibly bad. Like, really, really terrible. And they showed it today against the Tampa Bay Bucs, losing 38-10 behind a 2-interception, 0-TD effort from Brady Quinn. But they did score one touchdown, and it was weird. Here, in four steps, I'll teach you how to accomplish the Weirdest Play Ever.

Step 1: Block a punt.

Step 2: Let the punter get the ball back.

Most of the time in this situation, a punter will fall on the ball or kick it out of the endzone, sacrificing a safety but guaranteeing that the other team won't score a TD on that play. But Bucs punter Michael Koenen had a better idea.

Step 3: Intercept it when that punter tosses an awful punter-pass. Or recover the fumble when he fumbles. This is kind of a hybrid interception-fumble. An interumble.

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He has season tickets, even though he can barely pay rent.

Meet the Hipster Jets Fan. He showed up in the stands during New York's beatdown of Indianapolis.

Hi, Hipster Jets Fan!

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Literary burn!

Source: reddit.com

I love this so much. You can almost imagine the clerk coming into work, tossing his bag onto the counter, and ignoring the pleasantries from his coworkers. "Hey Charlie, good night?" "Morning, Charlie." Not now. Not when I have truth to defend.

"Where are those blank stickers?!" And then the sharpie of justice came down and branded Lance Armstrong forever. A photo was taken to commemorate the occasion. High fives were thrown all around. It was uploaded to Reddit, so that the world would know of this most epic of literary burns. Then all the clerks stood around for a long moment, before one of them reminded Charlie it was his turn to do inventory, and he really should go do that.

H/T IsSocca on Reddit.

Players dodged projectiles and hid under riot shields.

In the second leg of a qualifying match for the 2013 Africa Cup of Nations -- the most important soccer tournament in Africa -- the Ivory Coast played Senegal in Dakar. The Ivory Coast was ahead 4-2 on aggregate after a first-leg victory, meaning Senegal needed a lopsided victory to qualify.

Didier Drogba put the Ivory Coast up 1-0 with a spectacular free kick, all but sealing Senegal's exit from the tournament.

Source: youtube.com

Drogba later added a second goal from the penalty spot, and down 2-0, and the scene in Senegal turned ugly. Home fans started small fires around the stadium.

Image by Stringer / Reuters

Police forces fired tear gas into the crowd, but it did little to deter rioters.

Image by Stringer / Reuters

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Being this close to Robert Griffin III is enough to drive anyone crazy.

After a 76-yard touchdown run yesterday, Robert Griffin III jumped into the stands to celebrate.

Being near the Washington star sent this girl in particular through a roller coaster of emotions. Let's track how she processes it.

Stage One: "HOOOOOOOOLY SHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEIT"

Stage Two: "Oh my God, is this really happening?"

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Even when the Browns win, Cleveland loses.

I was born and raised in Cleveland, Ohio, and to this day am entrenched in an ongoing love affair with the city. I know that doesn't make a ton of sense, but you know how Rihanna still seems to love Chris Brown for some reason, even though the rest of humanity knows he's the worst thing in the world for her? It's kinda like that.

Anyway, I've spent many a drunken night in New York (my adopted home) defending the Cleve from "Mistake By The Lake" cracks and jokes about LeBron James. So imagine my surprise and delight when the Browns actually found a way to win a game this week in the midst of one of the most depressing stretches in Cleveland sports history (which is saying something). Finally, I could come into work without hearing about my quarterback being a member of the AARP. Finally a break from Joe Haden's Adderall love. Finally a day of moderate pride about something in Cleveland.

But of course I couldn't even get that one nice day, without someone from Cleveland totally Clevelanding the moment. I give you, "Browns Fan Dunks Head In Bucket Of Urine For $450."

Source: youtube.com

This must have been how Bane felt when he looked at Gotham. Sometimes things need to be destroyed and rebuilt.

I will say in his defense, $450 will pay for like 8 months of rent in Cleveland.

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